Man Maths: Porsche Panamera 4S Diesel

Now spool forward to an unspecified date in 2017 where you’ll find me sitting in a suitably equipped Panamera 4S Diesel with, unusually, feet hard down on both pedals. This is because I’m sitting at the bottom of the Bruntingthorpe runway trying to trigger the launch control. This duly done, I simply lift the left leg, sit back and watch the car do the rest.

Back at base the data revealed this bog standard four-door diesel saloon had hit 60mph from rest in 3.6sec, 100mph in a barely believable 9.3sec and peaked at 165mph not because we were in any danger of running out runway but simply because I’d got bored just sitting there. That 0-100mph time was quicker than its contemporary second-gen 991 Carrera S. The car was graveyard quiet, rode beautifully, did over 40mpg and, with a 20-gallon tank, would put 800 miles between fills.

So Porsche killed it. At the time the official line went on about changing environments and diesel not being quite the right form of power source for a Porsche, but I was far more convinced by the rather less official line which claimed that in the wake of the still breaking Dieselgate scandal, Porsche wanted to put as much distance between itself and anything supplied by the Group with diesel in its veins as possible. It was on sale in the UK for just 14 months. But what a car! Quite the best Panamera I’ve driven, before or since.

In a way it’s not really the right kind of car for Man Maths, subjects of which should usually have something heroically inadvisable about them, and it absolutely does not, but it’s such an outlier, rarity (just over 200 sold in the UK) and such a fine, continent-busting luxury express, I hope I am allowed this one indulgence.

Besides, with prices starting around £30,000 for leggy examples and stopping just shy of £50,000 for cars with fewer than 25,000 miles on the clock, I think they’re a bit of a steal too.

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